Test Retires, TRPs Hired: Rohit Sharma, IPL & The Great Indian Cricket Circus
By Kapil Gupta
So Rohit Sharma has retired from Test cricket.
And no, this isn’t about respect. It’s about timing.
Perfectly timed. Almost… IPL-scripted.
Let’s cut the crap. Rohit’s test form was flatter than a soda left open in May.
Nine matches. Avg: 10.93.
Forget Virat vs Babar debates — this was Rohit vs Rohit. And he lost.
So yes, the Test exit makes cricketing sense. But why now?
Oh right. Because IPL needs a damn storyline.
This ain’t just a league anymore.
It’s Bigg Boss with bats.
Scripted. Timed. Released for TRPs.
Get the hashtags rolling, boys. “Last of the Hitman Era”, “End of Rohit in Whites”, “What Next for the GOAT?”
This is no coincidence. This is IPL-astrology.
Mercury’s in Gully. Saturn is bowling no-balls. And Rohit Sharma just gave the Test cap a goodbye kiss so he can trend during mid-season viewership slumps.
You think I’m being harsh? Let’s talk ecosystem.
This ain’t cricket anymore. This is a self-fulfilling gambling loop.
Fantasy apps. Betting platforms. Gaming cos.
Sponsoring players. Owning teams. Dictating commentary.
They don’t just promote the game — they manipulate the damn narrative.
“Oh, what a fantastic match!”
No bro. What a fantastic script.
Even Ekta Kapoor would say: “Thodazyada ho gaya.”
You want a deeper problem? Here it is:
IPL is now eating into Indian cricket’s soul.
Test cricket is dying because it has no cheerleaders. No filters. No sponsor reels.
Rohit Sharma’s retirement isn’t just an exit.
It’s a loud mic drop on the format that gave him stature — for a league that gives him sponsorships.
Cricket in India is no longer a sport. It’s a Bollywood-Betting hybrid.
And the fans? Just addicted extras, tossing coins and memes.
Cricket fatigue is real. Not because we don’t love the game.
But because the game doesn’t love itself anymore.
We keep replacing emotion with engagement.
Legacy with likes.
Stature with stunts.
Rohit Sharma was a Test warrior once.
Now, he’s a brand ambassador for Version 20.0 of The IPL Show.
And that, dear fans, is the real retirement story.
Not from cricket.
But from purity.
